THE CITIZEN INDEX

Thursday, May 28, 2015

Hey, Bella just wrote a new post, about something or another, and she probably didn't proof read it.



This dress was a thrift store score ages ago. I saw it, I loved it, I wore it. You can see me prancing about in it, in a ridiculous outfit post here. I've since outgrown it, and have it listed for sale here.

It's a lovely thing, full of youthful joy and optimism. Not quite like me, who turns 50 in a matter of days. 

I thought it was going to be harder to do it. Turn 50. 

But it seems, it's just another calender day, no biggie. Just another turn in this fantastic place we call a planet. I am glad to be alive. 


I find it curious how one of my favorite eras of clothing come from the years when I was just a wee kiddo. I absolutely adore fashions from the mid to late sixties, in particular, I've got a soft spot for 1966-68. I love the squeaky clean look and appeal of fashions around this time, with the bright cheerful colors, bold prints and those over-sized collars. LOVE 'em all. The boyfriend, born in 1972, is drawn to fashions from that era, which I find interesting. Even if we can't remember it, the zeitgeist, it claims us. 

I've never been more glad to live in the present, too. I adore this 21st century life. We kinda get the best of all worlds, tech, arts and nature. I'm here to enjoy it for as long a possible. It's a modern life I live, sort of, in a cityscape, sort of. Not very typical, or particularly fascinating, I suppose on the outside in, but it seems to have come to a pleasant equilibrium for me, and I think I may have stumbled upon the right balance. Maybe. 

The forties were a tough decade for me personally, there have been a number of setbacks, and plenty of loss. I do feel at times, a little worse for the wear. The beauteous shine of youth, has decisively jumped ship, and it seems the world has become immune to my charms. Many friendships over this past decade, have gone by the wayside, and while I mourn the loss, I am determined to bring into the next decade healthy and wonderful engagements with people I admire and trust, who happen to admire and trust me back. I have been seeking reliable full time employment for nearly 8 years, and after nearly a year of humbling nearly nada call backs, I am officially giving up on the search. Let them come to me. Goodbye 40s, don't let the door hit your ass on the way out.

In the meantime, I will apply my efforts to selling online. You are welcome to browse here and here, knowing your purchase goes towards a wonderful cause. I thank you in advance for your kindnesses. 

In fact, I created these custom Citizen Rosebud button brooches for those who wish to show their support: 
They are available for purchase HERE.

I have loved, loved, loved my time spent writing and blogging here on the Citizen Rosebud. It is my wish that I can continue to do so. I've even flirted with the idea of resuming outfit posts; after all, I'll be 50 and an old odd bird has got to represent! But we shall see. I'm not sure there's any interest in that, I've never won awards for my wardrobe prowess. But in all honesty, I am not sure what direction to go. Is there anyone left still reading this? Should I just close up blog shop, and batten down the hatches? Call it a day, cut my losses? 

All potent possibilities. Which option is the right move? I do know, regardless of this venue, I will go on writing, and creating, because it is like oxygen for my lungs, I can't breathe without doing so. I've been reviving a bevy of creative endeavors offline;  reading art books, playing around with painting furniture, and tending a modest garden.

This is a long and rambling way of saying: I'm still here folks. Even when here is somewhere else.

Celebrate, peeps. From one Rosebud to another, you're beautiful and blooming madly. 

19 comments:

Sheila said...

I'm here! I love your outfit posts - you inspire me! I hope you will continue blogging, Bella - your voice is heard and appreciated. A very happy 50th, my dear!

thorne garnet said...

I'm here, too. Your blog was the first one I ever read. Happy 50! It is a weird feeling, omg I'm old! I should know, I'll be 60 next birthday. How can I be that old? I'm really 35.

diaryofapennypincher said...

Ooh, please continue the outfit posts! You are unique, that's why we pop in to read! I would love to see some of your painted furniture too. Have a wonderful 50th birthday! xxx

Jill said...

Foxy at 50! I wish I lived nearby so we could pop open a bottle of bubbly (or two) to celebrate YOU! You are a writer so I know you are going to keep writing in some form my dear! Happy Birthday, dear Bella, the blogging world keeps shifting but there are plenty of us still not immune to your many charms! Keep going, honeybun! xo, Jill

Lindsay Rickman said...

Hey there! Of course we are still reading your blog, and happy very special birthday! I thought you have scooped up a few blogger awards over the years? You've been a big help to me and my internet stuff. Thank you for being an example, and a good friend. <3

Shybiker said...

Bella, keep blogging. Do it your way. Post what you want, express yourself. Your friends and followers are still here.

And enjoy your 50's. As someone further down the road, let me report that there are unexpected pleasures ahead of you.

Becky said...

Hiiiiiii! Blog when/how u want! I've had a few twists and turns this year and my blogging is def worse for the wear, but I like having it anyway <3 Happy 50th babe!!!

J. said...

Beautiful post, hits the nail on the head! I enjoy your blog, keep going. Happeist of Birthdays to you!

Vix said...

Bella, I can't believe, as the champion of Over 40s bloggers, you'd ever consider 50 as old or that any woman's outfit choice wasn't worth sharing.
Follow your own wise advice and remember than age is nothing but a number.
Happy Birthday to YOU! xxxx

Jazzy Jack said...

As you can see, there is definitely interest in your point of view, and your display.
Personally, I pop in for your writing, your secondhand prowess, your love of flat shoes and your cute smile! Xo Jazzy Jack

Sara Kristiina said...

HUGS. I must say I love going through your outfit posts, your style is so delightful! But I agree with others, keep blogging but do it as you want, we'll keep reading :3

sylvia @ 40PlusStyle said...

Lovely to 'see' you again. We are still reading Bella, so keep being your true, original self!

Melanie said...

Happy Birthday, Bella! Yes, look at everyone here. Follow your heart! I love your "ridiculous" outfit post, and I can't imagine that you still don't have that youthful joy and optimism. The world will NEVER be immune to your charms.

Val said...

Happy Birthday, Bella, and I hope the next decade will give you new and better opportunities! I'm like you, only blogging occasionally now, but I like to check in every so often. I hope you continue to do the same because it's good to hear from you!

Beth Waltz said...

Happy Birthday, Bella! You're right to view the years as a series of garments you've worn -- some are keepers, others best discarded. I, too, find it difficult to accept that relationships change and die just like people. Sometimes it's sad; other times, not so bad.

Keep up the good work. And if you're nosy about finding work as a woman 50+, I'd recommend scouting the offerings at usajobs.gov. The Feds don't care about your model year, so long as there's tread on your tires. Honest.

Sue in Spain said...

Come on Bella - 50 is the new 30, or didn't you know that? If I can still post the occasional outfit at the age of 67, you have no excuse not to do the same as a mere 50 year old! Please continue with your blog as it's on my blog list and I don't want to have to remove it (more work!). Onwards and upwards is what I say! I celebrated my 50th birthday wearing a gold dress - I'm sure you will wear something equally lovely and hope you will post a photo for us all to enjoy.

Sue x

Forest City Fashionista said...

This is such a beautifully written post Bella - Welcome to your 50's! You're in find company, don't you know ;) A number of points in this post resonate with me - I too am a fan of the styles of the late 60's, a decade in which I was too young to wear them.

Your statement about having lost friendships over the last decade is also true for me too, and it's been sad, and a bit liberating at the same time. I don't want to waste time and energy on people who consistently bring negative energy into my life, or, who just aren't interested in spending time with me. It is unfortunate for me that I feel more connected to the members of my online blogging community than I do with people where I live.

There are times when I feel my blog has become work, rather than play, and I think about calling it quits, but I worry about losing the connections I've forged with other bloggers.

You are an interesting, creative and intelligent woman in your 50's just as you were in your 40's. Yes, there's a little more wear on the chassis, (and some weird shit starts happening to your body that no one warns you about), but it's good to be here, above ground.

Happy Birthday!

Rosalind said...

My mum turns 50 this year too - and you are both beautiful, vibrant, creative (and well-dressed) women.
When you post, we will read it. Wishing you warmest, wonderful-est birthday wishes for the day itself.

No Fear of Fashion said...

Oh Bella.. How wunderful, this post. So well written, so true. I have to say I had recently given up on your blog, when I received your email with the fantastic news of marrige equalty. I would still read you when you start again. Because I think you have a great personality. Something like "f the world and biased opinions, this is me me Yeah".
Congratulations with your 50th birthday. I am 61 and agree with Forest City Fashionata: weird things will happen to your body. Seemingly overnight. Accept and deal with it the way you feel most comfortable with. For me that was having my waist return by sucking the fat (sounds horrible doesn't it?) and by wearing bodyshapers. That is me. You might deal with these things differently. Just know that life after 60 is still pretty awesame. Been there.
Greetje